The ‘New Norm’ and ‘Re-entry Anxiety’
It’s nearly 3 months now since our world was changed forever. On the 20th March 2020 Schools, pubs and restaurants shut their doors in the UK and on the 21st Gyms followed suit. ‘Lockdown’ was announced the following Monday; people were told only to leave the house if absolutely necessary. In the following weeks thousands were furloughed whilst others were told to work from home. Public transport was drastically cut. Shop shelves were empty as people panic bought toilet rolls, pasta and baked beans. Keyworkers put themselves at risk in the NHS, shops, public transport, delivery drivers, and teachers. I don’t have to tell you any more we have all lived through it.
Lockdown is now being gradually eased.
What does this mean for our mental health? Wow we’ve been on a roller coaster! I’m sure most of you will recognise the emotions I have definitely experienced: shock, confusion, frustration, anger, grief, loss, fear, sadness, joy, comfort, love, acceptance, despair, hopelessness, anxiety, depression. Sometimes one after another quickly cycling, sometimes overlapping, sometimes not recognised until in retrospect. Notice I’ve included ‘love, acceptance, comfort and joy’; these have definitely been present for me. I feel safe in my little home bubble, I have been fortunate that I am in good health, I’ve spent hours gardening and walking and the weather on the most part has been glorious. Joy in watching spring turn to summer, people on the whole smiling at one another in the streets and thanking our key workers on a Thursday evening. I’ve spent valuable time with my teenage son which I may never get the opportunity to again. I’ve enjoyed not going to work; I certainly haven’t missed the rat race. I’ve taken the Government advice to heart; I’ve “stayed safe”.
Now the time to return to work and return to school. WTAF?? I thought we were going to die if we left the house? There are still more deaths a day than when we went on ‘Lock down’. Shops are starting to open, restaurants, pubs and hairdressers will follow soon. They already have in many countries.
I’ve become aware of a phenomenon called ‘re-entry anxiety’ – I know I have it! ‘Re-entry anxiety’ is a specific anxiety around the fear of being unable to adapt to or not wanting to return to previous routines. In this case ‘the new norm’ of living with the threat of Covid 19 outside the safety of our homes and of social distancing measures. It is very similar to the response people may have after a traumatic incident for example a car accident or being in caught up in a terrorist incident or war. When we have been in a very dangerous situation it is natural to have a huge amount of anxiety about putting ourselves back in that situation e.g. getting back in a car, back on public transport, going to a concert again etc or in this case returning to a new and very dangerous world. We have all been through a collective shock and trauma; we were told we could die, weren’t we? how can we return to “normal” or accept “the new norm”? How is the world suddenly safe for us to return to? Everything has changed; change causes most people huge anxiety. Our new world is an unknown possibly very unsafe place.
How do we get our lives back? How do we face the new world and the new norm?
I think we need to be aware of the messages we have been given “stay home”, “stay safe” was drummed into us; the world is an unsafe place; there is an invisible threat. These messages may not be so easily unheard.
People tend to like routine and certainty; at the start of ‘lockdown’ this was thrown up in the air but most of us have developed new routines, new ways of doing things. Now we are expected to change again and no one really knows how this looks at the moment. We have a lack of control and still have the fears that have been drummed into us. On top of this will our jobs be safe? The economy is in collapse isn’t it? Is life about to change more than we can ever imagine? Will we catch the virus now we are allowed out again?
Perhaps it would be helpful to acknowledge that this is real and accept our lives will change. But we can remind ourselves of the facts; cases and deaths have dramatically gone down in recent weeks in most areas of China, Europe and the UK. We can have an outlook that is proportionate to how threatening the virus is to us and our family and friends and remind ourselves of how we want to live our lives. Do we want to live in fear or can we see the benefits of life returning to some kind of “normal”? what do we gain from seeing our friends, family and work colleagues again? We can consider what we can and cannot change and concentrate on the former. We can try to get out and meet friends and family and surround ourselves with people who have a positive outlook. If we have been stuck indoors for a long time we can try to get out as much as possible, fresh air and exercise have proven benefits to our mental health. We are ‘allowed’ to meet others outside; try to make sure we take advantage of this new privilege. Take it slowly and gradually if needed; don’t venture too far from home if this causes anxiety, try to find places that are not too busy if we are unsure about seeing too many people. If we start to feel overwhelmed concentrate on breathing, go home and try again tomorrow; take baby steps if necessary.
If you are worried about returning to work speak to your employer; let them know your concerns; chances are they are feeling anxious too. Remind yourself that they will be doing whatever they can to ensure that they are safe and that includes making sure that you are.
We may not be able to control what this world is about to throw at us but we can challenge ourselves to control the way we react to it. We can accept that we are going to feel more mixed emotions and that realise that this is ok.
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